|Dimensions||5 × 5 × 5 in|
The MEAT EATING VIKING GUNFIGHTER SHIRT. A garment as awe-inspiring as it is mysterious. Legend tells of an ancient tribe of Norsemen that would scale a frozen and windswept mountain to earn the honor of wearing this fearsome article into battle. Thus adorned, these warriors were unstoppable on the field, and their mere visage would cause enemies to flee in terror.
Our t-shirt, a direct descendent of that mythic relic, is known to cause the following side effects to the wearer:
*(None of that is true. All of the listed side effects are guaranteed. All of the guarantees are imaginary. And we guarantee that was confusing.)